Nether Region Hair Care Products That We, Um, Don't So Much Covet

Okay, so, am I the only woman in the world that didn't know that her nether regions should be referred to as 'Betty" (and, can I ask, does that make 'Veronica' the asshole?) And, also, am I the only woman in the world to whom it has never occurred to color the hair of her nether regions? Because, this product I just do not get. Who cares if the carpet doesn't match the drapes? Who even notices? And why on earth would anyone ever want their coochie to boast a 'novelty color'?

Here, I suppose, is where I show my age and general fustiness.  In my day, a Brazilian wax was adventurous. Keeping the fuzz and coloring it rainbow brite? YOU CRAZY KIDS.

Betty Beauty Hair Color For The Hair Down There, $19.99 @ BettyBeauty.com

Comments

[Kim]

No. Effing. Way. Maybe if you're an exotic dancer?

[BaltimoreGal]

I guess it's safer than regular hair dye, which is good (they sell it at Kiss N' Makeup in my Baltimore neighborhood).
http://kissnmakeup.netfirms.com
Still, not my thing. No, no, no.

[Kia]

Yeah, I''l go with Exotic Dancer as the only excuse to use this. Otherwise, this is totally inexcusable. Besides, who has the time or energy to sit around naked from the waist down while you wait for your carpet to turn some crazy color? Ridiculous.

[Ellynn]

I read one of those lovely internet stories that circulate your inbox no matter how many times you request, "No forwards," about a girl with her patch dyed green. She had a tattoo above it that said, "Keep off the grass." She went into the hospital for emergency surgery and when she awoke, one of the orderlies had put a post-it note on her dressing that said, "Sorry, had to mow the lawn." I thought it was funny, but not endearing enough to entice me to dye my nether regions.

[Jill (CDJ)]

OMG... The place I get my nails and waxing done sells this stuff and I find it High-larious. Who would relaly do that? I can't even imagine buying it!!

Reminds me of the SITC when Samantha found a grey hair down there and freaked out. That didn't end well, and I'm guessing if us real life people tried this it would be just as bad. And for the record, the place where I saw the pink dye also sells blond, brunette, etc... So the rug can match the curtain, I guess???

[anna]

You didn't mention the best part- there's blue, so when you get married you've got "something old, something new, something borrowed, and something blue."

My friends and I decided that you'd have to flash old ladies who asked what your "something blue" is, and that provide giggles for 5 solid minutes.

[Erica]

Um, I agree- this is a completely pointless product. Like I need one more beauty routine to maintain!

[Kimberly C]

It's something I would do once as a novelty for the husband- I used to dye the hair on my head pink and red and feel funny doing it now- so *maybe* to bring the punk back to the bedroom.

But upkeep? No.

[Bethiclaus]

I about died when I saw that they're marketing their "Malibu" color as a bride's "something blue." Ick.

[Mary]

Ew. Just ew.

[Maiken]

Not such a fan, but as FOTC says, "if that's what you're in to." I have plenty of other carpet questions. Maybe there should be a coochie foundation. ;)

[Susan]

My fat arse sitting on the john dying my pubs- I think my DH would never have sex with me. I am all for the coochie foundation though!

[bunny]

LOL! Certainly not my cuppa tea.

[Syko]

My nether region is named Lucille, thank you very much.

And she's bald.

[Elaine C.]

I laughed so hard at all these comments! I agree with the comment that it might be fun once as a novelty. When I read about this I immediately thought of a prank someone played on her OBGYN: she made her nether regions bald and used fake eyelash glue to put googly eyes down there...

[Suzy Q]

Ha! I've seen this shiz before. Course, I don't need it cuz I'm already unusually colored in mah "special place."

[Kristi]

I'm just thinking...wouldn't that hurt or burn or something? I mean...those are chemicals. I just don't want harsh chemicals anywhere near my betty or my veronica!

[margemayhem]

Heck, I don't have TIME to mess with coloring "down there."